Save The Words is a website upon which one may officially adopt an infrequently used word with an accompanying promise to attempt to use it as frequently as possible.  I am not certain whether I chose my word or it chose me, but the pairing was eerily accurate.  After the page loads, one sees a screen like the one below.  When you cursor over the various words inside the square they begin to beg to be chosen.  If you click on a word, a definition of the word and an adoption agreement appear.

If you do not wish to adopt a particular word, simply left clicking on any other word will remove the current definition and display another for the next word.  How could one possibly decline such a rare opportunity as this?  Of course I adopted a word and later, by email, received a certificate of adoption, almost suitable for framing.

The word which I adopted just happens to mesh beautifully with both my cynical and suspicious tendencies and provides a most excellent excuse topic for future posts.  After all, I did promise.

Peace, Doc

Copyright © 2009, Thomas A. Blood, Ph.D.

phylactology  n. science of counter-espionage

"You can tell he's the Professor of Phylactology by the overcoat, fedora hat and sunglasses he wears during lectures." – Oxford FAJAR, a subsidiary of the Oxford University Press.

A few days ago I received an email from a good friend.  I had mentioned in a previous Gmail that I had bought myself some computer "stuff," which happened to include a cheap USB outboard drive for 3.5 inch, 1.44 MB diskettes.  Computers don't include drives for that outdated data storage media any longer, but I have somewhere close to 400 of them (give or take 100) in "the room that still must be entered with great care."  Given the capacity of these diskettes and multiplying by 400 of them, the information on all of them would fit onto one CD.

Included in the email was a online catalog page from etsy.com which displayed a desk accessory crafted from recycled diskettes.  I will simply copy and paste my (redacted) response for your entertainment and amusement.

XXXXX!!

Ooh!  You've given me an idea.  That is usually a dangerous thing.  Not to you; much more likely to me or the cats.  How do you think an entire living room wall would look if covered in multicolored floppies?  Stripes of color or a mosaic?  Small shelves or shadow-boxes made of floppies?  A picture or poster frame?  End or corner protectors for sofas to foil cat claws?  Oh, the possibilities!  Maybe a chandelier using colored, fluorescent, energy efficient green bulbs and floppies.  I haven't done a good, nutball project in far too long a time.

You have made me a very happy old poop!  I wonder if there might be a way to make a Celtic Cross or other Celt design with them?  Possibly a very stiff quilt (it would keep the cat damage down somewhat.)

About the 1000 Watt power supply.  That refurb 64-bit HP PC I got a few months ago only came with a 300 Watt PS but will be supporting either 1.6 or 2.6 TB of hard drives, a heftier CPU and cooler, another 4 GB of RAM, and "other funny stuff" in open bays or as peripherals.  It was on sale for under $100 so I just went for it.  It will be running at least XP and OS7.  I'll be able to write the fastest damn haiku ever!"

The part that now amazes me is that I never connected this project with duct tape (pun intended.)  New horizons of the ridiculous have opened for me.  Do you think Bittle and Stinky would tolerate small suits of armor, made from floppies and duct tape?

Peace, Doc

Copyright © 2009, Thomas A. Blood, Ph.D.

"If it's there and you can see it — it's real.
If it's not there and you can see it — it's virtual.
If it's there and you can't see it — it's transparent.
If it's not there and you can't see it — you erased it !" – Author Unknown

Seneca’s parkland

Nurtured shades of playfulness

Long since dead and gone

Peace, Doc

Copyright © 2009, Thomas A. Blood, Ph.D.

"Do you know what it's like to put your life in another man's hands, son?!"  Jack Nicholson to Tom Cruise - A Few Good Men. 

I did that yesterday when I finally went to an appointment with the CPA who had "inherited" my files when my previous tax person retired.  I took with me a huge wad of papers, threatening letters, forms, sale contract and checks on CD, W-2's, 1099's, Social Security forms, no claims for deductions except for property tax paid on the house before it was sold, (let's keep it really simple) and sundry other "stuff." 

When I met the CPA, he smiled and asked how he could help me.  I told him that he was going to save me.  His smile seemed to become larger.  I babbled out the nearly incomprehensible story of how I got myself into this situation.  Each portion of the explanation made sense when taken alone, but when put together I was certain that I made little sense.  I handed over every bit of material I had with me, told him who my attorney was (where he might get some lost records) and signed a Power of Attorney allowing him to act for me in all tax matters for three years.  His smile grew quite broad at this point.

   
I had taken my check book and credit cards with me but no request for payment was made.  A dreamlike feeling crept over me like I had just eaten a wonderful meal in a chic French restaurant but only afterward noticed that there were no prices on the menu.  This feeling was enhanced by the realization that he held all my stuff as hostage, had my Power of Attorney, and was positively beaming at me.  As I left the well appointed meeting room, a single thought repeated itself in my mind several times, accompanied by a feeling much like trying to sigh in relief and gasp in apprehension at the same time.  I hope they don't serve frog legs in that restaurant.  He asked if I'd be home next week.

Peace, Doc 

Copyright © 2009, Thomas A. Blood, Ph.D.    Pictures courtesy of Microsoft Office 

"The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax." - Albert Einstein, 1879 – 1955

I have been thinking about this notion of getting older.  Is it "growing older,"  wherein the key word is growing?   Or is the operative word simply older?  Am I an asset to society or am I just setting on my … umm … rear end?  I'm afraid that by simply asking myself the question, I am also telling myself the answer.  I shall therefore immediately contribute to society by publishing a haiku about not contributing to society.

Inconsiderately Alive

Societal drain

My existence costs you cash

The dues have been paid

Peace, Doc

Copyright © 2009, Thomas A. Blood, Ph.D.

"I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top." - Will Rogers

Having nothing better to do between trips to and fro from County Clare, Ireland to the Tower of London in the late 1600's, our intrepid blogger decided to return to the days of his youth.  Then again, it may have been a dream.  Isn't it all?

Peace, Doc

Copyright © 2009, Thomas A. Blood, Ph.D.

"Fuck the trophy, give me the check." - Jerry Ruth after winning the 1972 Winternationals.