Computer Personality Assessment

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2009/10/6

Computer Personality Assessment

I am quickly coming to the conclusion that this Dell laptop is becoming as quirky as its owner. Everyone gets their settings and preferences arranged to a configuration that just feels right to them. There are a number of ways in which that can be done incorrectly, but mostly if it only involves poking keys without digging into system or protected files, you're OK. It can be fixed relatively easily. This Vostro, however, seems to be displaying some early signs of AI (Artificial Intelligence.) It isn't as big as HAL of 2001: A Space Odyssey so I should probably give it a smaller name like AL (Artificial Lunatic.)

Yes. It has begun to develop odd behaviors for which I have no logical explanation. For instance, during boot up, it has taught me to wait until it makes a small "screep" noise before I may proceed or I am doomed to a really unusual session.

I don't know if it resents my placing it on the floor when I go to the refrigerator (or elsewhere), but it will be doing something I hadn't planned on when I return. Possibly I'm projecting if I admit to being uncertain, here. I think it may feel abandoned and act out its anger by "doing something funny," or whether this may actually be the case. I have pretty well ruled out cats on the keyboard, and the mouse seems unmoved. Here I reach one of the many "I don't know" moments of my life. Those seem to be getting more frequent lately, but I digress.

One immediate reason I am writing about this is that I have just had to reboot to restore it to sanity. The keyboard refused to respond while I was writing an email. This occurred immediately after a trip to the kitchen for some water and a mixed fruit cup. The mouse worked and any page functions related to it worked well. It simply refused to write anything. About two days ago, my Google gadget sidebar disappeared from the right side of the screen. AL will let me visit it if I wish by left clicking the far right side of the monitor screen. It then appears exactly as I left it, until anything else on the desktop is clicked, at which time it once again hides behind the right edge of the screen.

The thing that most upsets and intrigues me is its decision to unexpectedly play music. It only does this while the Firefox browser is in use and it is always the first line of a Grateful Dead song I downloaded to RealPlayer about four months ago. It is predictable only in that it will be the same song and always associated with Firefox. It does not seem to be related to any particular website, to my amount of time online, using the browser while another app is being used, or any other factor I can discover. The upsetting part that I mentioned earlier is the song it always plays; "It Must Have Been The Roses." This is a song that I strongly associate with Annie's death and the lack of friends after her death. It contains a line, "Nobody comes 'round much anymore," which has been true of my life since her death. What do you think (other than someone planting a RFID chip, that is)?

Peace, Doc

"My software never has bugs. It just develops random features." – geek24.com site.

Technorati Tags: computers,AI,AL,HAL,cats,oddities,computer revenge,refusal to respond to keyboard commands,idiosyncratic computer behavior

1:32 | 写入日志 | Computers and Internet

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	Rita发表: I come here often to read your posts but I don't comment very often. You know alot about computers and I wonder if you could help me. I have a dell inspiron 1525, just a year old now. I use IE8 I left the laptop for a few minutes and came back to HUGE windows and fonts. The desktop fonts and icons were BIG. I tried the usual stuff, right clicking on the desktop to do various checks. Nothing as worked. A few people have tried to help to no avail. I checked my graphic drivers and all are good. So, if you can think of anything at all for me to try I would appreciate it. It is annoying scrolling back and forth and up and down just read one HUGE page...sigh 11 月 8 日
	FlowerHappy发表: Wow, this sounds spooky. I can see the link to abandonment issues; perhaps, sent from warehouse too soon before proper weaning from birth technicians? Hope not something too Oedipal? Does it just 'act out' if one is sneaking junk foods? Is it monitoring and reacting to any behaviours? Is this a Windows Update I missed? LOL Bit disconcerting song choice and sorry about that reminder. My ancient computer hums and squeeches all the time, especially at the automatic downloads. But now I'm thinking that it's been long enuff that HAL could be ... hhhmmm think I found my Hallowe'end costume idea. Thanks for that :) 10 月 13 日
	Deb's发表: morning Doc, ((hugs)) you know life is sending you a message when even your computer is reminding you are alone and that no one visits you, sooooo.... my question would be are you taking the hint and getting out there and taking the initiative and visiting ... taking a chance and calling on old friends, or family. or are you still ignoring the signs. ;)) love n hugs debs xXx 10 月 13 日
	...Ms Ana发表: And you say you're all alone? You have (apparently) another sentient being right there with you! However, if we are going to share our lives with another, we DO have to accommodate their quirks and insecurities, however annoying they might be, lol. I think of my computer (currently in a very undignified coma), my car, my mobile phone and any other amazingly complex piece of machinery, as a friend. I cajole them, plead with them, praise them and generally respect them. I know how much I rely on them - and as any good friend, I appreciate their willingness to make my life easier. BUT - may I suggest, sometimes 'tough love' works best, lmao. Get in there, clean him/her up, and then EXPECT them to return to a proper, supportive, friendship once again. Optimism works wonders! roflmao 10 月 7 日
	☼kïrstin发表: gremlins? k 10 月 7 日
	Neora Chana发表: Just in time for Halloween.... 10 月 6 日
	Just Mandy发表: And when it's cured his computer, Fizz, he'll just have a bog standard, quirkless, box. Nah! stick with the quirks, (like people) way more interesting! 10 月 6 日
	PsychologistCynical发表: Thanks for the suggestions and comments. I figured out how to make the Google gadget sidebar stay put on the monitor. Jade was right about "auto-hide" but I fixed it before reading her suggestion - great minds thinking alike and that sort of thing. John and Cassie are both right in a sense, but we do develop preferences which we program into our computers, and as we build more and more powerful Artificially Intelligent (AI) machines, the closer they come to mimicking human thought (poor things). Our own programming (habits, manner of thought, learning, general behavior, etc.) seems to rely very heavily on something or someone outside ourselves teaching (programming) us in specific ways. Our RAM, HDD, and CPU are tissue structures that perform the same general functions as computer hardware. Fizz, I'll check on the RAM. That might be a good guess as I generally see its amount of use hovering around 50% or a little more. "YODA" here thanks you all. 10 月 6 日
	Grumpy-PantsFizz发表: Sounds like you might have some bad RAM. Some of the goofiest things I"ve ever seen were associated with bad RAM. Also, think about updating your graphics card driver. Sometimes, the best driver isn't downloaded. Don't take the computers word for it, either. Go to the website, either ATI or nVidia and download the latest driver for your OS and card number and just re-install. Take two asperin (or other goodie) and call me in the morning. 10 月 6 日
	Cassie发表: hey john...of course computers have personalities and genders and so on. They are extensions of ourselves, after all...made in our image...after our likeness :-) 10 月 6 日
	bordjohn发表: Amazing how we ascribe personas to inanitimate objects. The poor machine has a gender ID loss of memory and quarks....it is but inorganic elements....So says Freud....hum? 10 月 6 日
	Jade发表: I always name my computers "friend" .. to me, they are all quite sentient :) google gadget has a check somewhere to 'hide' the music sounds abit like a browser hijacker or some kind of spyware to me- not good. 10 月 6 日
	Just Mandy发表: I 've had my PC for about 4 years, and since the day I bought it, it's had it's only little whimsies, It chatters to itself, at odd times, it also does that screep sound, for no reason I can discern it suddenl won't let me clck on things, I've got an optical mouse, and while it's competely stationary the curser will creep diagonally up the screen??? and while all is completely quiet, I can hear voices and music from my speakers, while they are turned right down and on Sundays sometimes church bells! Seems TG is right, or maybe puzzle! 10 月 6 日
	puzzle发表: maybe there is a wormhole to the discworld in your appartment? > http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hex_(Discworld) 10 月 6 日
	Tricia发表: OMG, so you also have a female laptop!! Why are you trying to unerstand it? DOn't you know this is not possible?? Many years ago, when the first IBM Golfball compositors came out, I had a delightful companion (male) who whenever I suffered from PMT would simply freek out and refuse to work .... this meant bringing in a technician from London ... complete with new Motherboard (maybe it wasn't male afterall) which always took at least 24 hours, giving me time to get over myself!! They never found out the cause, and I'm convinced it ws simply simpathy ...... 10 月 6 日
	...Technogran发表: It is a well known fact of life Doc that all new technology has a life of its own. We tend to think that 'artificial intelligence; i.e that can think for themselves, have not yet been invented but I assure you that this is simply not true. Any object that contains 'chips' is alive and capable of independant thought. It's not just our computers either that are capable of this. Your PVR (Tivo in the states) can refuse point blank to record certain programs that it takes an umbrance to, your washer can devour socks daily, it is all around you .......... The truth of the matter is your laptop is lonely and resents whenever you leave it unattended. Firefox happens to like that particular piece of music, and therefore has an inbuilt ability to 'turn it on' whenever it loads. Unbeknown to you it does this on anyone elses computer who happen to have that peice of music 'on board' However Doc, don't be tempted to rectify this by deleting said music, because all you will achieve is that Firefox will then refuse to load. Your Google sidebar is sulking either because you have some gadget installed on it that it has had a previous spat with and therefore doesn't like, so it will keep on hiding from you until you remove said Gadget from its sight. You have to remember Doc, computers, whether they are laptops or desktops get lonely in exactly the same way that we get lonely, they don't like being left alone. Can you not take it with you on your trips to the kitchen? Of course the other course of action is to buy another laptop to keep it company........ 10 月 6 日